Monthly Archives: August 2008

A peace offering- from the real peoples’ club

It occurs to us we may have been a tad harsh on our recent opponents Boston United.Yes, they were only giving an honest opinion about the state of the pitch, and the songs about the general state of the ground and Cables fans were just a bit of banter.Obviously they’ve had a tough time in their recent freefall from grace, hitting several thorny branches on the way down.This one’s for you lads and lasses,see you next year,and hopefully the year after that…

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Boston-Grow Your Own

Tense nervous headache caused by Prescot’s crappy pitch? Unable to beat rubbish teams? Missing the glory days of a Wednesday night trip to Scunthorpe played on a majestic playing surface? Cheer up, you can grow your own pitch. That’s right, relive the day you might have beaten Real Madrid in the Champions League Final using players made out of bottletops in the comfort of your own bedroom. This offer comes with a guaranteed no points deduction

Grow your own football pitch using the actual, official grass grown at the stadiums of Old Trafford (Man U) and Emirates (Arsenal)!

Did you know that each pitch has its own special type of grass especially designed for it?There’s a special Boston United one that comes with a built in spirit level.

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Just What’s Wrong With Our Pitch?

Dunno what all the fuss is about.......looks ok to me

Dunno what all the fuss is about.......looks ok to me

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Intergalactic Whining League Table 08/09

  1. BOSTON UNITED:  Fans started complaining about Hope Street from the minute they got off their coach.  They didn’t appreciate (in no particular order)…..the stand being on top of the clubhouse, the length of the grass, the bumpy playing surface, no ground level seating (obviously couldnt see the grassy bank on the gas works side because CABLESTIGER was draped all over it), commented to the Referee that he might get lost in the long grass.
  2. WITTON ALBION:  Fans complained about the state of the pitch in the 2007/08 season……but did have the good grace to comment on the improvements to not only the pitch but to the clubhouse.
  3. GUISELEY:  Never heard any complaints from these goodnatured yorkshire folk…..but if you know different, please comment.

This post will be updated throughout the season…..feel free to add comments and influence the overall rankings

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Join the campaign

The Sons of Slacky Brow have started a campaign to press the team management to sign this Keeper. If the defence fails the Keeper kicks the bejesus out of anyone within 30 yards of his goal.

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An idea to stop the opposition scoring

Lets take a leaf out of Scotlands book

Let's take a leaf out of Scotland's book

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Boston en Mass

Prescot is steeling itself for the influx of foreign visitors tomorrow, Saturday 30th August 2008.  Star spangled banners hang from every lampost, tree and drunk (not McScouse) in the Town Centre to welcome travellers from Massachusetts.  All to celebrate the fact that tomorrow sees the mighty Prescot Cables involved in the first International football game in its illustrious history.

We have been advised that Boston have a couple of offensive players, but that doesnt bother us………our fans can more than match them 😉  They have at least 3 defensive players, so be very careful how you speak to them, we don’t want to cause an International Incident eg do NOT make reference to their oddly shaped balls or armoured ballet outfits.

How To Spot A Boston Fan

Ordinarily it is easy to spot an American…..just look for a mismatch of checks and polka dots with baseball cap on backwards.  However, the Boston faithful are Pilgrims and will be dressed in a plainer fashion than their countrymen.  To aid Pilgrim Spotting, please memorise the picture below:

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